Peace. Sometimes we find peace through a whisper, a prayer, or a song. I was not finding my week to be particularly peace filled. I was struggling in the overwhelm this week. But then, my song came on the radio, in the midst of a morning that was unplanned and less than ideal. My song, ok it’s Phil Whickam’s song. It’s called “Battle Belongs.” This. This was everything in that moment. This is my fight song for a rough week. My battle cry for when everything seems like it’s going wrong. My heart can so easily be lead astray, my mind is a battlefield, and I can be my own worst enemy, and if I don’t give it a second thought, I can be ruled by my emotions and my circumstances. Anxiety can creep in like the big, bad wolf dressed as a sweet, old granny trying to rob me of my peace. Before I know it, I forget who I am, I forget who’s I am. And sometimes it takes the lyrics of a song to remind me,
“When I fight, I fight on my knees, with my hands lifted high, oh God, the battle belongs to you. And every fear I lay at your feet, I’ll sing through the night. Oh God, the battle belongs to you. Almighty fortress, you go before us. Nothing can separate the power of our God. You shine in the shadow, you win every battle. Nothing can stand against the power of our God.”
So, in the car, between icy rain filled school drop offs, I lifted my hands (hand, I was driving), and poured my heart out to the Lord in song, tears in my eyes. This week was His battle. All of it. I am just His vessel. And I am to fight on my knees. In every parenting moment. In every moment of Kenny’s crazy work schedule, before, during, and after the blizzard. In every unexpected moment. In all of the mundane. In all of my exhaustion. In every drive back and forth and back and forth and back and forth from evening sports practices. In every disappointment. In every frustration. In every failure. In every joy. In every victory. It all belongs to Him. All glory. All praise. All of it. All of me.
So, when I don’t give in to the fear and anxiety, and when I don’t give in to every emotion. And when I open my eyes and my mind and my heart to realize that this is not my battle-then-no matter the situation-I can have peace. I can have peace knowing that God is in control of my marriage, of my parenting, of my husband, of my kids, of my emotions, of the schedules, of our home, of the storms (of all kinds), of it all. I am His vessel. I need only be still and know that He is God.