This morning, I was full of excuses in my mind. It’s dark, I’m tired, I was so busy yesterday that I should stay in bed and sleep a little longer, I wrote twice yesterday so I should skip today and sleep. I didn’t press snooze but I may as well have because I just laid there thinking just a few more minutes. Thankfully I didn’t fall back asleep, so here I am. Writing for another morning. Day 4 out of 30. But, I have an important question. Do weekends count? I am back and forth on this one. I’m thinking weekends don’t count, and then I just pick up with day 6 on Monday? What do you all think?
Perhaps we can learn another lesson from my favorite bear, Winnie the Pooh today for our Thursday Thought. Pooh Bear said, “I always get to where I’m going by walking away from where I have been.” When I first read this one, I moved on and had my sights set on a different quote, but as I went back through the list looking for that other quote, I came back to this one. How true it is! We can’t get to where we want to go by staying where we are. We can’t make changes by staying the same. We can’t do nothing and expect something to happen. We can’t just think, we also need to do. Yesterday morning, I went over my writing time, but not really. There were the distractions and the pauses, but when I returned from the pauses, I really wanted to finish. So I sat in my writing recliner and I wrote 10 minutes later than I planned to. I was so proud of myself. Until I realized that I now wouldn’t have time to shower or eat, oops. I changed my clothes and figured it’s a messy bun kind of day (it wasn’t even a bun, it was a nest) and when I gave up on the idea of a shower, I was able to make something to eat really quick and eat it equally as quick. Still proud of myself though, I moved forward, but realized I had really blown my chance at a shower… I had plans to walk April with a friend, had two dogs to walk, pick up my mother-in-law from the bus, Logan had an early release and then one more dog to walk, a little break, another dog to walk, drop Logan off for the talent show auditions, pick Christopher up from track, drive him to a friends house, get Evan and his friend to basketball practice. And so I thought, NOW I’m an artist, Un showered and starving, but not starving anymore… I could only hope that I would only be in the presence of dogs and not humans (family doesn’t count). Yeah, not so much. With my lack of shower and usual morning routine, I thought I should make the most of it and go for an afternoon run, yes that would be my new plan and justify the nest I was sporting in the back of my head. But by the time I got Logan, walked that dog and then got home, I realized if I ran, I still wouldn’t have time to shower and at this point I should probably skip the run. In all of this mess and all of this busy, it was confirmed to me, why I am waking up early and not having my writing time in the middle of the day. Because life will take over. Phone calls will come, errands will need to be run, my kids will need to be driven to and fro, there will be appointments and games and meets and practices…So many things need to happen and there are so many things pulling at me. It’s always been this way in one form or another, even though this season of my life looks different than ones prior. I can’t get to where I want to go by doing all the same things. Life is full of sacrifices. We have to make choices every day. Some days we have to sacrifice what we want to do for what we need to do. Some days we sacrifice what we should do for what we want to do. I think it is important to evaluate each situation and to spend some time prayerfully considering if it is the right choice or not. I could not have lost 20 pounds by continuing the same eating and lifestyle habits. I can’t be a writer if I don’t make time to write. “I always get to where I’m going by walking away from where I’ve been.” Today I chose to walk away from where I was in pursuit of where I want to go. I showed up. Where will you show up today?
My Wednesday night stream of consciousness below. The brain is a funny thing.
March 31, 2023 at 8:30 am
Truth! Love it!